It's kind of too bad, but I make a really rotten hostess. And part of the reason I'm so bad at it is because I would love to be good at it... but I'm not. I'm always thinking, "Ooo, it'd be great to have this big party for [fill in the blank] reason." Usually those party ideas of my own never end up panning out. But when I'm volunteered to host some sort of event, I get just as excited about it. "Ooo, it'll be fun to have the family over for [fill in the event/holiday.]" And I think ahead to all the ways I can make it a cute get-together and all the ways in which I can show my family/friends a good time in my home. But then the day of the event arrives and I realize I've done nothing to ready my home, nothing to make my fabulous plans for the party come true, and on top of it all, I develop this sudden surge of claustrophobia where I think, "What was I thinking??? I want to go to bed right now (nevermind that yesterday it was 2:00 in the afternoon,) and now all these people are coming over and I know they're never going to leave!!!"

So yesterday Martin's family came over for a little get-together for his brother, Tony, who's being deployed to Iraq. We had it at our house because it was the best place to have it. And I was really happy to have it here! Really, I was! And all weekend, I said to myself, "okay, self, I need to clean [state every room in the house individually as if it's the only room to be cleaned] and get all AnnLaura's maternity clothes together for her and blah, blah, blah..." and on Saturday I did some minor cleaning up around the house, vowing that Sunday morning I would really hit it hard. But then Sunday morning came. And went. And suddenly it was Sunday afternoon and Martin and I were running all over the house trying to make it look at least presentable. And we did succeed in the end, but it was a hectic few hours--which totally didn't need to be that hectic since this get-together was not anywhere near being a last-minute thing. So anyway, there went my enthusiasm for entertaining. Then I was mad at myself for not being a more organized person, which made me grumpy, which made me more mad at myself because I knew I wasn't doing a good job of hiding my grumpies (and tiredness and social anxiety.) I think I overcame it all by the end of the night though. And it was a nice get-together, complete with pizza and cherry cokes.

We had a good weekend but it absolutely flew by. I can't even remember now what all we did, but whatever it was, it was fun. And I liked the freezing rain that Saturday supplied. Anja loves Ben Folds!! That's a pretty great thing, considering how much I love Ben Folds. And Martin does too, except he evidently forgets how much he loves him between listenings. We've been listening to his "Songs for Silverman" in the car and I love, love, love it.

I've also discovered why only married people are supposed to have children and it has nothing to do with morality. It has everything to do with snot-sucking. Anja gets some really colossal boogers and try as I might, I'm just not aggressive enough to get the things out with the little baby boogie vacuum. Martin, however, is a pro! And he's getting better every day too--the other night he got BOTH nostrils cleared and she hardly even made a peep! (The first time she screamed and screamed... maybe because I had been torturing her for a long time before Martin came along and saved us both.) What would I do without him? There are lots of other things that he does besides the nose stuff that I just can't force myself to do. I think it has everything to do with him being an aggressive man and me being a timid lady. And since for the most part, that's what couples are made of, this must be the reason society has always preferred people to be married before they start having babies.

Okay, so just for the record, this post was started at 6:30 this morning and now it's almost 6:30 in the evening and I'm just now getting back on the computer to finish it. I've had a crazy Monday! I can't believe how fast Mondays go by now that I have so much to do--and a time limit on it all. Today was made easier by my mom helping me out with my errands--she stayed in the car with Anja while I ran shirts inside to the cleaners, then the three of us went to the grocery store together--but I still had so much to do and so little time that I didn't get everything done.

When Anja was born we decided we weren't going to mess with dragging her around in the carseat all the time. I don't like to handle it, it's so big and bulky and heavy, I'd rather just take her out of it and carry her, especially now while she's so tiny. And I'm getting pretty good at eating one-handed since she usually wakes up right about the time we sit down for dinner every night. However. Anja is NOT a fan of her carseat, and she's even less of a fan when it's been sitting in the cold car for more than a couple of hours. So now we take her in and out of the house in her car seat and while she is much happier this way, I keep thinking I'm going to drop the whole contraption and kill her.

Baked chicken with carrots and onions, and mashed potatoes and gravy for dinner! Mmmm, smells good!!