So I've been thinking this morning about homeschooling and the effect (affect? the biggest grammatical stumper I've never been able to get straight) it might have on me and my kids.
We're not going to homeschool. For lots of reasons, the biggest being the fact that I make a rotten teacher and there is no way on earth I could make my kids turn out smarter than I am (the ultimate goal) if I taught them at home. In fact, if I taught my kids at home they'd never learn to do simple math and their science experiences would range from petting animals to mixing primary colors and nothing beyond that. It would be a VERY BAD THING if I were to homeschool my kids.
But that's not the area of homeschooling that's been on my mind today. What I've been thinking about is what is going to happen to my kids when all of my friends and family are homeschooling their kids and my kids are going to Catholic schools? Will they have no friends??? Will I be forced to run with a different group of people??? Will they be total nerds because all the nice nerdy kids are homeschooling and my nerdy kids are the only ones enrolled in the local system??
I personally am excited for my kids to go to school. I might have hated the actual "school" part of school, but I had a pretty good time all through those years. Partly because from preschool through high school graduation I was with the same group of kids. All but one of my closest friends--including my husband--I made in school. What would've happened if I'd been homeschooled? Would I be friends with Joannie? Maybe--our families are connected by the parish and it's likely we would've met and become friends anyway, but probably not in preschool. Would I be friends with Perkins? Most definitely not. Where else would I have ever met her? Would I even know Martin? Again, maybe... but it would've cut out our whole exciting history! In the grand scheme of things, school was nothing but good for me. It's not like I was one of those "popular" kids who had it all, but I had good friends and good times and I'm really glad that I was given that experience and not taught by my mom, although my math skills aren't any better than they would be if she'd taught me!
Now, this is not a post meant to be read as homeschool-bashing. That's not where I'm going with this at all, so don't anyone get defensive.
I know that one thought in favor of homeschooling is to keep kids away from the inevitable bad influences that come with being in school around so many other kids, some of whom are not raised with the same values with which you raise your own. Aha, but that's the trick--there are SO MANY of us at St. Boniface running in the same crowd, having babies all at the same time, we would completely drown out any bad influences by our numbers! When I think about all the babies who've been and are being born this year who would all be in Anja's class at school it makes me happy, but when I think that those kids will probably not be enrolled in Catholic schools, it's not as fun to think about. Of course I want Anja to be friends with my friends' kids, but that's hard to do when you don't go to school together and are only 8 so you can't drive a car yet and only end up seeing each other at church functions and the few family parties a year. Even within my family--it would be SO INCREDIBLY CUTE if Anja, Julia and Isabella were all in the same class at school. But what happens if Anja IS the only nerd in the class because all the other nice nerdy kids are homeschooling? And you can say "Well, Annie, then you'll just have to consider homeschooling" but I'm telling you, it's simply not an option. It would be a very bad thing for my children if I were to even make an attempt at teaching them at home. They would be dumber than dirt.
I guess it was a combination of finding out that Andy and Kristin Korty had their baby and some events that took place at my parents' house last night that got me thinking about this. Last night we were all up at my mom and dad's house eating cake and ordering shoes when the phone rang; it was one of my dad's old friends from highschool was in town and wanted to drop by for a visit. We were still there when the friend and his wife arrived, and it was so funny. All of a sudden everyone is happy and shouting (in a good way) and talking about who from their class is doing what and how people are related--as it turns out their nephew goes to Wabash and is in Martin's fraternity. And thinking about it in the car after we left, I think the lady might've been Mrs. Meluch's sister? All these little connections, and they all went to CC together, as did Martin and I and all our friends. I'd be crazy not to wish fun like that on my kids! The Catholic community in Lafayette is so small and slightly incestuous that it's hilarious and wonderful and I'd be so happy if my kids could be such a part of it as we all have been.
Anyway, those are my thoughts. So let's take over the school system with our super cute, well-behaved kids who are all the same age!! They will rule the playground! They will dominate the sports teams! They will get together forty years from now and still have things to talk about because they still know (and are related to) all the same people!
Do it for yourself. Do it for the kids. Do it for my daughter!!
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http://www.jconline.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=2008805120326
Anybody see the article in yesterday's paper?
I was just going to post about that article. It was GREAT!
I will probably not hs forever (I certainly can't teach biology or statistics!), but for thost younger years? It's just so fun! Take yesterday, for example:
We read together, learned all about Pentecost by baking a cake (math and science too!), learned about and observed the butterflies we grew / hatched, went to Mass together, and played outside A LOT. We shared our Pentecost cake (and all that we had learned) with our Ooma, Oompa, Nana, and Martin, and the boy next door. But the poor boy next door couldn't stay long, and couldn't play in the sunshine, because he had a big project, among other homework, due in the morning.
The Catholic schools here are good and I will certainly never, ever, become a school basher, but for now, for us, we are learning and having so much FUN!! Don't you want to play with us??
I was so glad to see that article after that last couple months! :)
We had talked about starting our own school at one point... Grant teaching theology, Doc Meadows teaching the sciences, me teaching Spanish, Claire English and so on and so forth... Denver offered himself up as janitor, though I'm sure he'd be a great teacher too. I'm still 100% in favor of this idea and then you wouldn't have to worry about Anja being alone. (Though I DID read that article, yea!) But if we do that idea, John and I would DEFINITELY move back up to Lafayette once there are children (God willing!) You could teach music...?!?! :)
I will teach the firearms and survival classes.
Annie, I COMPLETELY agree with you. While school wasn't all that great at times, and I definitely don't think we were in the popular crowd, and there were times I hated it, I wouldn't give up those years for anything.
First, there are just so many memories! I'm making myself laugh just thinking about them all... (we were really strange).. for some odd reason, one of the first things I thought of was that crazy pioneer day we had in Miss Anthrop's class? When the 5th graders would come and we showed them pioneer things? I'm really not sure why I just thought of that. Hm.
But anyway, I really wouldn't give up my experience for anything. Sure, you're exposed to some not so great things... but hello, you have to do it sometime. You can't hide your kids forever. You might as well have them see the world when they can come home and have you explain to them why something isn't right. And sure, they might get picked on for something-- but it builds character.
I just smile when I think that we've known each other since PRESCHOOL! I LOVE IT!
So, in conclusion, I just want to say-- don't worry... my kids may not go to school with Anja, but maybe by your fourth or fifth child, I'll have a kid to go with them. And they can be BFFs.
when I wanted to home school, a wise husband questioned my self-discipline. He said my daughter and I would have too much fun and wouldn't be serious enough about learning the things we didn't necessarily want to learn. A wise priest told me that if I homeschooled my children, that I would removing them from the people that they needed to be around as well as the students that needed to be around my children. So, I listened to both and kept my children in school. I never regretted it because they made some great friends and were good examples to plenty of kids too! The schools in our community are too good to not take advantage of them. And there are plenty of little Anja Schaps out there and with home schooling, you would be missing them! I agree with Anja Schap's wise mother (and probably father too!)
a mom
While I agree with "a Mom" in part, I have to disagree a little. I DO NOT agree with homeschooling children all through 12 grades....however, the Jesuits (the old GOOD ones) said, "Give us a child until he is seven and we will have him for life". I agree with that. I see no reason for sending your children off to be taught by people whose values you don't completely know until they are at least 8 years old, if that is at all possible. You can set their values pretty solidly in seven years. If you send them to school at grade 3 or 4, they will still make wonderful, life-long friends, as Annie did with Joannie.....and I believe they will choose the right sort of friends. Those two would have found each other under any circumstances! And I think it would be the same for all of the kids. That said, I DO NOT agree with the people who just keep their children at home and isolated from society, thereby teaching them that "the world" is bad. In my experience, those children are the first to leave the Faith as soon as they can. They may seem like the "perfect" children, with their hands folded all the time, but in the end it doesn't really pay off.
I really believe that the attitude of "this is the way we live and believe" without a lot of crazy pressure will pay off big benefits in the end.
Mrs. H.
BTW, I am enjoying this discussion. It is interesting to me as I will (hopefully) be in this decision making process in the next few years...
We're still undecided as to whether we'll be homeschooling and to what extent. So much of it, of course, depends on where we end up and what the schools are like there.
But also Peter's own homeschooling experience (which was from 6th grade through hs) has him pretty skeptical about the possiblity of people turning out "normal" if completely homeschooled all through high school. To some extent I think he's just kidding, but in another very real sense little effort was made to keep him involved as a member of the community and that makes a huge difference on a person's ability to interact socially. Or at least it did for Peter. Which is another thing to consider - each child is so stinking different, it's sometimes hard to make an "across the boards" decision.
Anyway, obviously there are a ton of things to be considered in the whole schooling decision, and we'll be continuing to hash through them until kindergarten and probably after!
In response to: "That said, I DO NOT agree with the people who just keep their children at home and isolated from society"; isn't it a bit strange to say that being at home is being separated from society? The family is not (or doesn't have to be) an isolated, private unit. What about extended family, neighborhoods, churches, etc? I don't think children schooled at home have to be isolated from society--though I agree that some homeschooling families DO isolate their children and keep them too separated from the rest of the world.
And from a different comment: "And sure, they might get picked on for something-- but it builds character" If you're just talking about relatively friendly teasing, then I buy this. But, some teasing doesn't build character; rather it destroys it. From about 4th-8th grade I experienced what I would call merciless torment by a group of girls in my class. Though it started out in 2nd and 3rd grade as just being occasionally picked on, it escalated to the point where by 7th grade the entire class had turned against me, I had not ONE single friend in the class, and I dreaded going to school each day. My poor mother could not afford to stay home and teach me herself, and the public school where I lived was very bad. I was stuck, and just had to endure it.
I guess my point is just this: any type of education can be good or bad depending on the particular needs of a child, the circumstances in the school or home, and the various resources at a family's disposal. I do agree that homeschooling is not the only good option for Catholic families in principle. So maybe, I'm really just saying the same thing as everyone else!
You have a nice blog, Annie, and your daughter is very cute! I actually came over here from A Shortcut to Mushrooms (I was in Anna's class at Christendom).
Elizabeth B.
I think you got a discussion Annie! lol!
To homeschool or not, it really depends on the parents and their kids. Their are to many options out there to say "one size fits all."
OBTW- I was home schooled and notice the "to" instead of "too". The worst part is that my mom was an English major and I stink at spelling and grammar. lol
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